The Powers That Be

Will you allow me to be stronger

To take a leap and become better

To hope for love and dream for more

To jump for joy

And smile.

Keep smiling.

Smiling.

Smiling.

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L-O-V-E

Love this song

Love And Other Things

Author: Bagande

love

How about that?

I think I am afflicted.

I am an unrelenting, miserable romantic.

And for the life of me, I do not know how I got here.

In my head, I am a cynical, independent feminist. Who doesn’t need any man to complete her.

In reality,  I love a mushy romance novel, a cheesy chick flick, and I dream of falling hopelessly in love…exactly like how it happens in the movies.

I want the cheesy soundtrack and the prince charming. The steamy first kiss and most importantly, the happy ending.

But life is rarely ever like that.

And if your life IS like that..well. Shooooo! Yes! I am shoo-ing you off my blog. You have no place here, o’ person with perfect life. I am here to vent and say that romance is dead, and love does not truly exist. SOOOO before you contradict me, and then I subsequently bite your head off with venomous jealousy…ermmm….kindly press the esc key and be gone 🙂 Hurry along. Yes, good. Now then.

Where was I?

Yes, Love is poo.

Really, it is,

Its this horrible thing, that makes you feel good for a while, gets you hooked, makes you severely confused, and then up and leaves.

Leaving you horribly bereft and worse off than before!

Okay, okay I know, most of you will be saying by now that I’m contradicting myself.

Yes, I said love doesn’t exist. And now, I’m moaning about it.

What I really meant was that REAL love. Romantic love. Movie love. Love love. Yes, that one! Its not real.

Tell me one person, who fell magically in love (ahem, ‘in lust’ more like) at first sight, and their marriage lasted 70 years?

Yea.

You can’t find one.

I on the other hand, met this lovely 92 year old lady. Whose marriage HAS lasted 70 years. And her story had nothing to do with romantic movie love. It was war – time and she did ‘what was expected of a young lady.’ Nonetheless…she is as happy as a peach. Although probably just as wrinkled as a peach too. She was lovely. And she held my hand and told me of a long, and fulfilled life. With many children, and many laughs.

Life isn’t really in technicolour.

Its a splodge of colour here. A splash of laughs there. A collection of moments and half-whispered promises. Hold on to those moments. Enjoy them. Revel in them. Wash your face with them. THIS is your life. Not that one in the little box you watch.

* Disclaimer: This was written when I was feeling throughly disillusioned with ‘love’  I am currently still a hopeless, hapless romantic 😀 *

There Are Nine Million Bicycles In Beijing

There are nine bicycles in Beijing

That’s a fact

Its a thing we cant deny

Like the fact that I will love you till I die.

We are 12 billion light years from the edge

That’s a guess

No one can ever say its true

But I know that I will always be with you.

I’m warmed by the fire

Of your love everyday

So don’t call me a liar

Just believe everything that I say

There are 6 billion people in the world

More or less

And it make me feels quite small

That your the one I love most of all.

 

Love

She loved the guy. She did it for him. She would’ve done anything for him. Some women are like that. Some love are like that. Most love are like that from what I can see. Your heart starts to feel like an overcrowded lifeboat. You throw your pride out to keep it afloat. And your self-respect. And your independence. After a while you start throwing people out- your friends, everyone you used to know. And it’s still not enough. The lifeboat s still sinking and you know it is gong to take you down with it. I’ve seen that happen to a lot of girls here. I think that’s why I’m sick of love. – Shantaram

Webs Of Disdain

The keening of her broken heart pierces his soul and infects his mind.
Seeping, creeping; Black perfumed poison.
Bejewelled eight-legged widows,
Chattering in dismay.

Happy Father’s Day

How many of us overlook the role played by our fathers? For those of us who have experienced a dad’s unconditional love,we don’t realize how lucky we are.

…….

For all the times you picked me up when I fell
For all the times you chastised me to make me a better person
For all the times you hugged me when I was hurt
I love you Dad

For everytime you called me to make sure I had enough cash
For everytime you smiled at me and told me I looked beautiful
For everytime you played the chauffeur and drove me …everywhere!
I love you Dad.

For the times you cooked for us
And changed a dirty diaper
For the times you put baubles in my hair
Even though you weren’t sure how
For the times you defended me
Even when I was in the wrong
I love you Dad.

Happy Fathers Day
You mean the world to me.

The Silk Scarf

With a purposeful stride, I looped round the neighbourhood. Past scruffy cats, stinking storm drains, and many, many, kiosks. Little shanty houses. Made of corrugated mabati and pieces of left over wood. I scanned the area looking for one specific kiosk; ‘Ma vitu mob’ kiosk.

As I walked in, my eyes adjusted to the dim lighting. A single naked bulb hung from the ceiling. The whirring of machines, and the soft glow from several computer screens lit the place  with an other worldy glow. My eyes swung to the swarthy man at the counter. I had to squint to see him clearly through the smoky, dark room.

‘Ah, ni Kamau!’ I thought.
Its kamau.  I’m sorted. After some coin had exchanged hands, I settled down to wait.

A shimmer of bright orange caught my eye. A triangle of silky fabric. Luminescent in the darkeness of the room.
A ducked head.
A giggle.
And a glance.
Sweeping dark eyelashes, thick and slick, like weary candle wicks. Was she looking at me out of the corner of her eye?
Yes she was! I saw that. With a grin, I settled more comfortably on my stool. Waiting would be entertaining after all.

Her smooth, dark skin glowed.Her teeth, a startling white against her lips. Was that a smile? I smiled back…. inwardly. Kamau could be back at any moment.

With a heavy heart, I forced myself to look away. I have no time for beautiful girls in silk, orange scarves. I don’t have time for anything really. Anything other than feeding this heavy hunger in my heart. I faced the counter and hunched my shoulders to wait.

A few empty seconds ticked past. My heart as still as a crocodile sunning itself. Every inch of me painfully aware of her innocent glances my way.

‘Umm, would you help me please? Computer ime freeze’

Now I was staring at pools of liquid brown honey. I felt like I was standing at the edge of my sanity. Diving into those swirling, molten twin pools would undoubtedly be my undoing. Helpless to resist, I fell into her gaze. A rare smile cracked its way painfully across my face. I shouldn’t, but like a lamb to its slaughter, I allowed myself to be led to the offending machine.
Control. Alt. Delete.
The machine whirred back to life. Magic. With another rare toothy smile (what was wrong with me?) I turned to face her.  What did I expect, a pat on the head? Disgusted with myself, I forced my face into a disapproving glare. She shrank back visibly. Oops.

I adjusted the volume of the glare. I’d forgotten how menacing I could look. In my world, a valuable asset. With a grunt, I indicated the fixed computer and waited expectantly. A stammered thank you floated from her lovely lips. The tip of her tongue darted out to wet the dryness that had suddenly afflicted them. I felt the same way. Parched. And she looked like a long, cold drink right now. Shaking my head at my cheesy thoughts with a wry smile, I turned to leave.
I could wait outside.

Dancing with fate, is not a game I like to entertain.

Often.

‘Sup Peeps

Sorry about the current lack of posts. I’m on HOLIDAAAAAY. Again. LOL.

And sure, you would thiiink that meant that I had more time to churn out great posts.

But peeps, as much as I love you, im too busy partayyying. Woot WOOOOT!

However, you can be sure that I have now gathered enough material to bore you silly with many posts of my holiday shenanigans.

If you’re nice, there may even be some pictures in it for you 🙂

Muchos Love,

QQ

Dance With Me

The way you make me feel…

It’s counterproductive.

To work…and like, other things.

I can’t help but smile knowingly.

I can’t help but daydream.

My heart sings.

My soul dances.

My body hummmms.

Come on,

Dance with me.

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